Extremes

(Written on 12 Dec. 2001)

You are the feather
     that tickles my bone
And the wasp
     that gets me to moan

You are the flame
     that burns my skin
And the breeze
     that sends chills within

You are the accident
     to which I am prone
And the habit
     with which I have grown

You are the poison 
     I have to spit out
And the spice
     I can't eat without

You are the hero
     who saves my day
And the villain 
     who blocks my way

The rule, the law
     I cannot amend
A chapter in my life
     I had to end.

Hello, Old Friend...

Hello, Old Friend...

It has been a while since I last posted here. I have been too busy...too preoccupied...and at times too happy to write anything. I guess what they say is true, that the sweetest songs are always the saddest. That one could only write beautifully when they are sad. I'm not saying that I do write beautifully. I guess what I'm saying is that one only feels that aching feeling to pour their hearts out and write when they are very sad.

So here I am...saying hello to you, Sadness, My Old Friend.  I'm a low point again. Oh well, that's life. There are highs and lows. And when you are at your lowest, you babble about things. Things no one could understand most of the time. That even you don't even understand the point at times. And that's where I am right now. At a point, wherein I just put pen to paper so to speak and I really have no idea where my trackless train of thought is taking me.

My eyes are heavy from crying from watching The Fault in Our Stars and somehow feeling pity for myself. I just found myself agreeing with Hazel Grace, "it's just not fair". I'm not dying, or sick, or anything but life, really is just not fair...

Dear Nian (A poem for a precious girl)

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Sometimes, it's difficult to prove that you love somebody because of the many constraints or hurdles in life.  Limitations set by time, by status, or by a person's capabilities. It is even harder when the involved person is a child. 

Children only knows black and white, they don't recognize a gray area. They only feel either love or neglect. It's difficult for them to understand certain circumstances that sometimes prevents us adults to show them our love.  But as they grow into adulthood, they ease into it. Sometimes they learn to understand and take it as it is. However, there are also times when they fail to see the love and focus only on the pain of unfulfilled longing for affection.

Random Thoughts 8: Dilemma

Just when you thought everything is already perfect, something more fun and exciting comes along. Now, you're in a dilemma whether to stay in that perfectly nice and safe state or, hop in on a risky but fun and exciting ride to somewhere unknown.

The only question is, "Is it worth the risk?"

Random Thoughts 7: On Being Happy

Life may not be all good and rosy, but we can choose to be happy.
You may not have the fairytale love story you've been dreaming of but hey! you have a love life, at least. Not all people do, so make the best of it. Give it your damnest best shot! ;)

Random Thoughts 6: Missing Things

Sometimes you wouldn't know what you've been missing until you feel or experience it again. That moment when you realize you have already forgotten how wonderful it feels. And then you ask yourself, "Why oh why am I depriving myself of this again?"

Falling Out of Love

We all know what is falling in love or how it feels, at least most people do. But what about falling out of love? How do we know that we are falling out of love? What are the tell-tale signs, if there are any?

I once answered an "Are You Falling Out of Love Quiz". There were 20 questions answerable by Yes, No and Somewhat. The quiz briefly explains falling out of love before the questions:

Circuit Breaker

(A Poem of a teenage girl's first intimate moment)

He touched my arm
And electricity flowed
He gripped my hand 
Then walked and I followed

Making Time for Friends

Some people tend to neglect their friends when they are in a relationship. They don't go out with them anymore and limit their worlds to their partner. But when the relationship goes sour or fails, they seek their friends out and find comfort in them.

Random Thoughts 5: Special Bond

What is this thing that connects us to some people? That for some reason we feel a strong connection with them even if we have only just met. Or we have only been together a few times.  For a lack of a better term I'd just call it "Special Bond". 

Random Thoughts 4: Fascination with First Love

A lot of people seem to be fascinated with the concept of First Love. I admit that I am. Until now, I still wonder where my first love is and how it would be nice to see him before I settle down.  Not that it would matter now, but I guess I am just curious how we would both react. What it would be like, you know. Would there be a spark? A shot or pinch to the heart? Would my heart skip a beat? That sort of stuff.

Silent Desperation

(A Poem)

I wish I could say
What I really feel
I wish I could understand
Coz it is vague still

Couldn't find the words
To exactly describe it
Couldn't find the voice
To let it out with

Dormant

That is one way to describe my absence in this blog site.  It has been what? Four months since my last post? I didn't even have anything for Christmas, New Year, and VALENTINES!!! What is wrong with me???

Well, nothing serious really.  Just got caught up in this so-called real life. Holidays, sickness, death and now organizing a wedding! Yes, I do event organization and hosting sometimes. For special friends.

Anyway, I'm hoping to come back to blog life. After all, even volcanoes dormant for hundreds of years still come back to life, right? ;)

Prayer for Peace

(A Prayer Poem by the teenage Lady Olivine)

It may sound like a beauty pageant answer but I do wish for world peace. Here's a poem I wrote back in high school. It may sound cheesy but it came from my heart and I thought to share it here as my Christmas wish for the world.
Here goes...

Second Christmas Without You

(A Poem by a Lonesome Mistress)

Since Christmas is just around the corner, I thought to share this poem I wrote about  a lonesome mistress a long time ago...

Our second Christmas together

But again, together apart

And as it is, always

Only together in our hearts

Different Feet, Different Shoes

Just a while back, a friend of mine confided that she was dreading their upcoming high school reunion. When I asked her why, she said it's because she hasn't accomplished anything in life and she would surely be embarrassed when her high-heeled globe trotter former classmates would ask her how her life is. She's embarrassed to let them know that she amounted to nothing. 

AnOther Woman's Point of View

The Other Woman. No Other Woman. The Mistress. A Secret Affair.

No, this is not a review of movies about mistresses. No, that's not it. 

I just noticed that a lot of people are not exactly happy that mistresses are trending in movies, so to speak.  They (especially women) hate the publicity that these "other women" are getting lately.   Some people think that the movies are glorifying the act of adultery and the adulteress. And I just want to say I beg to disagree. I think it is just telling the other side of the story. Why, we always see "normal" or the usual love story, but we don't really complain even if they are too cliche? 

Broken Reflection

(A Poem by a teenager disappointed with herself)

I always stare at myself in my mirror
And watch as my reflection glow
I was contented with what I see
Because there's an ideal woman to be

A Blast from Rainer Maria Rilke

I have another confession to make…

Yes, what I said in my previous blogpost is true… that I have been busy with work and then lazy with my free time. But that didn’t keep me from posting in my other blog…but not here.  But that’s not without trying. I know that’s a lot of buts and it’s starting to sound like I’m just making up excuses. Well, the truth is I think I wasn’t inspired enough to come up with a topic about Love…Life…and Lies… I guess it has something to do with “not being sad”. You know what they say, “the sweetest songs are always the saddest”. Right?  Well, of course, we also get inspired when are most happy. Yeah, I agree.  I guess it is because I’m neither of the two.

...in a Coma

Wow! How time flies.... Has it been over a month already since my last post??? Ugh!  I've been a bit too busy with the nitty-gritty of this so-called life. Work and all the hassles that come with it. How I wish I could afford to just sit and relax, read and write as I please... Oh well, since that is not happening in the near future, I'd just have to squeeze my blogging in whatever little free time I have.